Today a boy I met on the skytrain. We had a little skytrain romance. Before we parted he told me my boyfriend was very lucky because I am beautiful.
So I see you
and i’m not sure if you caught my eye
or I caught yours
but we keep meeting briefly
in the middle
and I have this urge to know why
to understand
to explain
but I don’t want to ask
I don’t want to break the perfect forcefield of dilated perfection between us
so I sit
and I make up stories that I know you
or you recognize me
or you love me
and then the more I think about it
the more familiar you look
and suddenly we aren’t perfect strangers anymore
we’re just perfect
reunited
or united
I can’t tell anymore
because the past and your unfamiliar face
has become a fantasy
today
was a beautiful day
your face
i love the way
was a beautiful day
a lovely perfect wonderful
beautiful day
I talked about writing this, and this PostSecret I saw about how sometimes people stare at people on the train because they are beautiful, and the wondering…. and I forgot to tell him he was beautiful. And inspiring. And polite. Oops.
Also, he did not mention that I am the lucky one : )
Today I was part of the Vancouver We Day Crowd Pumping Team! Wow! I felt happy, sad, moved, inspired, uncomfortable, energized, tired, confused, clear, hungry, full, disappointed, overwhelmed, amazed… and more! What a day! I spent 11.5 hours at the arena (arriving at 6AM today) and still went to improv practice after! Bam!
I have been writing SO MANY songs lately (like 5-7 a week!) and I have decided I need to start sharing some of them and putting the music down so I don’t forget the vision I have in mind when I write. I really wanna be in a band but I don’t have time at the moment so I have to plunk my own guitar haha.
I have more thoughts I want to share later but for now I was inspired by Archbishop Desmond Tutu and Demi Lovato’s messages (at We Day Today) to write this song:
For My Children – Lyrics
VERSE ONE
When I think about what I need
I got clean water and a place to sleep
I’ve friends and community
but there’s something missing
separation that I see people hating and being mean
I want respect for everybody
PRE-CHORUS
That’s the world I want to live in
A world that I want for my children
CHORUS
When you’re scared, turn to love
When you’re alone, remember love
We can change the world with love
Before you judge, remember love
Show somebody that you care
Speak up for those who are not there
Treat each-other with respect
and believe in what comes next:
it’s love, it’s love, love
VERSE TWO
It is easy just to blame
Other people for our pain
If they’d only change their ways
“The world would be much better”
We all have a role to play
You contribute everyday
We have to work together
PRE-CHORUS
That’s the world I want to live in
A world that I want for my children
CHORUS
When you’re scared, turn to love
When you’re alone, remember love
We can change the world with love
Before you judge, remember love
Show somebody that you care
Speak up for those who are not there
Treat each-other with respect
and believe in what comes next:
it’s love, it’s love, love
BRIDGE
Structures are in place that make it hard to see beyond the struggle
Hating only add more hate. I think that love’s the only way to move beyond… and make the world incredible.
Raise the Rates has launched a new challenge, the Welfare Food Challenge. The challenge is to live for a week on the food that a single, able-bodied person on welfare would have – spending only $26. Sign up to take the Challenge below!
Of the $610 a month the BC government provides for a person on welfare, after paying for accommodation, bus tickets and cellphone (necessary to look for work), and basic hygiene only $109 remains for food – less than $26 for a week. There is nothing for clothes, haircuts, or any social life.
The challenge will start on October 16, World Food Day, and will finish on October 23. The week includes World Poverty Day on October 17th.
I am going to document what I eat each day, how much I end up spending, how I feel and anything else that comes up! I am staring mine a but late, likely on the 19th or 20th because I am volunteering at Vancouver We Day and will be up from 6AM to midnight for three or four days in a row so I won’t have time to plan my challenge until after the event.
I am going to try and do it low fat raw vegan style (fruit based) but am looking into the cost of organics vs conventional etc.
For a long time I gave up on the things I really wanted and settled for mediocre dreams. Forget that (Cee Lo Green style). People told me I wasn’t good enough, and that I’d never make it, and that can’t do it. Too short, too fat, not a US citizen, pitchy, talk too fast, not connected enough… But I am done with that.
Truthfully I have been on this kick since I saw the “Katy Perry: Part of Me” movie with my Mom this summer. I only get one life, why am I wasting it chasing my boring “attainable” dreams? It’s time to go big or go home, and if home is where the heart is then big I must go. During my later years of high school and the start of my university career I really settled into a frame of mind which let go of all my big aspirations, the dreams that are so exciting and so improbable that I’m scared… But that is the place where living truly happens for me.
But what will I do? What are my dreams? They have been quietly growing inside me for the past few years… Slipping out in the odd twitter post, inspiration, impulse to take an acting class at SFU, trips, meeting new people, the desire to audition… Professional role model, public speaker, leader… All guises for what I have really wanted since I was little…
I want to be a star. but not just any star, I want to be an entertainer, a famous entertainer. And I want to use my powers for good. I way to show the world my compassionate vegan self am bring more love into this Earth ball.
I think “entertainer” is a good word to describe what I want to do. I really have so many interests in so many things that it’s hard to choose… Comedy, music, acting, speaking… But there are people who get to do it all, and I want in!
Things I want to do:
Be on SNL (hosting or as a cast member)
Perform for a stadium arena
Write a book
Release an album (music or comedy or both)
Be in a movie
Host an awards show
I just have this feeling inside that this is what I was born to do. I am scared it will be hard, but self: you are special, you are unique, you are worthy… And you can do anything with enough perseverance and faith. If its not here yet, It’s just around the corner.
1 I will exalt you, love
for you lifted me out of the depths
and did not let my enemies gloat over me. 2 I called to love for help,
and love healed me. 3 Love brought me up from the realm of the dead;
and spared me from going down to the pit.
4 Sing the praises of love, faithful people;
praise love. 5 For anger lasts only a moment,
but love’s favor lasts a lifetime;
weeping may stay for the night,
but rejoicing comes in the morning.
6 When I felt secure, I said,
“I will never be shaken.” 7 When love favored me,
love made my royal mountain[c] stand firm;
but when love hid it’s face,
I was dismayed.
8 To Love I called;
to Love I cried for mercy: 9 “What is gained if I am silenced,
if I go down to the pit?
Will the dust praise you?
Will it proclaim your faithfulness? 10 Hear, Love, and be merciful to me;
Love, be my help.”
11 Love turned my wailing into dancing;
Love removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, 12 that my heart may sing love’s praises and not be silent.
Love, I will praise you forever.
Wow it’s been a while. I’ve had so much going on in my life lately and i’m so grateful to have all of this activity accessible to me!
One special experience I should blog about was my attendance at the UBC PostSecret Event. I got to see Frank Warren, the founder of post secret speak. It was pretty cool because I had actually looked into having him come speak at SFU but after looking at the cost involved decided it wasn’t feasible. We ended up with front row seats, which believe me were RIGHT in the front. I had to look up at the stage! Awesome.
The first thing Frank asked was if anyone had sent in a post secret. I proudly raised my hand and he asked me to share how it felt “awesome”. For that he gifted me a copy of the latest Post Secret book (and the only one missing from my collection) Confessions on Life, Death, and God. Yayyy! He shared some of the secret secrets with us and told a few stories. Time went so fast, I didn’t want it to end! Before he opened the mic to allow people to share their secrets he turned to me once again. These was a secret message written inside the front cover of my book that he asked me to stand up and share with the theatre.
The world needs to hear your voice.
After the presentation Frank was there to sign books and meet people. He told me that he gives out a book at every event and it usually has some special meaning or importance in the person’s life. At the time it filled my desire to contribute to the presentation (not having a secret to share at the mic but instead getting to share my special message with the room), but I must since since him mentioning that it’s become a bit of self fulfilling prophecy. It’s been lingering in the back of my mind and forcing me to speak up.
Afterward we went to eat at one of my favourite vegetarian restaurants, The Naam! Highly recommended, I love the bohemian vibe : )
Telling our secrets to Frank, the most trusted stranger (in the world?) : )
Raise you voice,speak up. The world need you hear you : )
If you haven’t seen it yet please watch the KONY 2012 video. You don’t have to agree with it, or support Invisible Children, but I think everyone should watch it to at least be able to contribute to the conversation.
Some people have responded to the KONY 2012 video (and there are many more but these are the ones that stood out to me):
Now I think it is one thing to break a law and be punished for it. I think that all laws are debatable. In some countries some laws take away human rights (often specifically relating to freedom in relation to gender and sexuality) so I don’t think the law should be the final word in any situation… however, according to the video, Kony is wanted by the International Criminal Court. According to their website:
The International Criminal Court (ICC), governed by the Rome Statute, is the first permanent, treaty based, international criminal court established to help end impunity for the perpetrators of the most serious crimes of concern to the international community. The ICC is an independent international organisation, and is not part of the United Nations system. Its seat is at The Hague in the Netherlands. Although the Court’s expenses are funded primarily by States Parties, it also receives voluntary contributions from governments, international organisations, individuals, corporations and other entities.
Their website also has an update on what it calls the “Situation in Uganda”:
The case The Prosecutor v. Joseph Kony, Vincent Otti, Okot Odhiambo and Dominic Ongwen is currently being heard before Pre-Trial Chamber II. In this case, five warrants of arrest have been issued against [the] five top members of the Lords Resistance Army (LRA). Following the confirmation of the death of Mr Lukwiya, the proceedings against him have been terminated. The four remaining suspects are still at large.
I think it makes sense that if many countries and their international court agree that someone should go to trial, then it is worth following up on. One thing I have heard some critics of the KONY 2012 video say is that Joseph Kony is evil and should be punished. I disagree. I do not think anyone is evil. I think all beings deserve love and respect and compassion – for if I were to deny these basic things to Joseph Kony, I would only be perpetuating the terrible allegations that have been committed in his name. I am not saying that I agree with his actions, or that I think the acts committed by the LRA should be condoned – however I think it is possible to still love someone, and know that they may have made a mistake or have done wrong.
Secondly I would like to write about the KONY 2012 video itself and some of the allegations and criticisms of it.
I disagree that the video proposes a simple solution, I think that the video presents one step in reaching a goal. Much like other activist campaigns that target small milestones on the road to an end goal (in this case: INVISIBLE CHILDREN USES FILM, CREATIVITY AND SOCIAL ACTION TO END THE USE OF CHILD SOLDIERS IN JOSEPH KONY’S REBEL WAR AND RESTORE LRA-AFFECTED COMMUNITIES IN CENTRAL AFRICA TO PEACE AND PROSPERITY). I love that IC has a very clear and specific goals and I really like the way they are so good at empowering people by giving them a common goal and realistic ways to contribute that everyone can be part of. It’s an interesting experiment on social change. As a North American Citizen, apart from sending US or Canadian military (which are not purely conflict based – I used to be very opposed to anything related to the military but I have learned that they also are a valuable civil service – helping when there are floods or hurricanes etc.. in Canada anyway), I can’t think of any other actions me and my government could take to end this conflict. I don’t think that in itself, tweeting a message, sharing a video or sending an e-mail can end a major world conflict, however I think it is important to make supporters a part of a movement. These small acts of sharing information can contribute to major shifts in priorities and thinking for individuals. I know my life changed the first time I saw a video from Invisible Children (which I found via Pete Wentz btw several years ago). Some people have said the video is creating more war and conflict. I don’t know how to end a war. I don’t know the right answer here. I do know that whatever action has been taken in the past 25 years has not been effective, because there is still a war… so I think a new approach may be necessary. Maybe instead of trying to end war, we should be trying to create peace. Even in this case though, I think the two are very inter-related. I think it will be much easier to create peace when the LRA is disarmed and no longer causing children to do terrible things.
I read many articles calling supporters of KONY 2012 young and idealistic. So? Join the party.
So do i support KONY 2012? I don’t have a problem with spreading information and creating conversations about Joseph Kony. I think the more people that think about the well being of others and the world we are creating the better. Love it, hate it, as long as you are thinking and engaged I think that is extremely valuable. Maybe you think Invisible Children is using the wrong tactics targeting policy makers and celebrities. Maybe you or someone you share the video with will have a better idea of how to create peace. I think that is the power of video, it can inspire other ideas and actions.
And don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a problem with people being critical of the video or of Invisible Children. In fact I love that. I think critical thought, questioning, sharing ideas, and making informed choices. I think if everyone was more critical Kony probably wouldn’t have had enough followers to start and continue to build a child soldier army in the first place. And being critical doesn’t always mean supporting the social justice or “left-wing” side of things. I think being critical is about looking at both sides of an issue and deciding what is right for one’s self. Perhaps education is the way to support critical thinking – perhaps we should support building school in developing countries a la the world’s largest network of children helping children or other groups… but when I reflect on my own life I am not sure that the current school system in most countries supports this. Sitting and learning from a book or a teacher isn’t engaging in critical thought in my opinion. Maybe I should be trying to create the next generation of critical independent researchers…. I really don’t know (nor do I think there is) a “right answer” here.
I do know that my involvement with invisible children (like this, this, this and this) gave me something to belong to. I felt like I was part of something bigger than myself, and I was. I have connected with other people as a result of past work with IC, and on several dark evenings I was not so alone in the world. So I am going to keep creating conversations about Kony. Maybe it will inspire someone to come up with a way to create peace, who knows. Everything is connected.
See you on April 20th.
UPDATE:
I have started this post several times and the situation keeps changing almost more quickly than I can keep up with. You may have heard that there are some allegations again Invisible Children founder, Jason Russell. IC released this responce video:
This message was released on behalf on Jason’s Family:
“Thank you to everyone concerned with Jason and his health. Jason has dedicated his adult life to this cause, leading up to KONY 2012. We thought a few thousand people would see the film, but in less than a week, millions of people around the world saw it. While that attention was great for raising awareness about Joseph Kony, it also brought a lot of attention to Jason—and, because of how personal the film is, many of the attacks against it were also very personal, and Jason took them very hard.
Let us say up front- that Jason has never had a substance abuse or drinking problem, and this episode wasn’t caused by either of those things. But yes, he did some irrational things brought on by extreme exhaustion. On our end- the focus remains only on his health, and protecting our family. We’ll take care of Jason, you take care of the work.
The message of the film remains the same: stop at nothing.”
