the meaning of sleeplessness, butterflies, and sweat

Wow, that an amazing morning of discovery. Here was my experience when I woke up today.

observations:

  • I am tried
  • My palms are sweaty
  • My stomach is churning
  • My mouth is dry
  • I have to poop
  • I think I smell gross
  • My neck is sore
  • I feel like my insides are full of tingly butterflies
  • I kept waking up and trying to go back to sleep
  • I feel nervous and worries about nothing
  • I am thinking and overanalyzing somethings
  • My heart is beating a little faster than normal
  • I am thirsty but not necessarily hungry (because I am afraid to feed the butterflies)
Have you ever felt like this? What does this mean?
The first time I experienced this was the first day I started drinking so afterwards I figured that was the affect that alcohol had on my body. Every time I partied after that I felt the same way but today I also have the feeling. The only thing is I didn’t do any drinking or partying last night. However, I’m noticing I didn’t have very much water yesterday and I went to bed at 2AM, but ate at 7PM. I now think these are the feelings I get when I don’t hydrate and nourish myself. When I first started partying I got into this habit of not eating for long periods of time (yay for being vegan at a party) and not sleeping enough (party all night wooo). I’m so glad to have discovered this because in the future I can take care of myself better as a result! Yay!
In the past I made up some pretty funny stories about why I felt this way… I am sick, there was a boy I liked around which is causing this, I have stomach flu, it’s insomnia, i’m going crazy… I’m glad to have a new conclusion to try out : )
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