I was reading THIS ARTICLE titled “Have I ever had “ANY unwanted/undesired physical or sexual contact”?” today and I found myself having a different experience than the author. I think the end especially was interesting…
I refuse to do the happy dance because I was fortunate enough not to be molested as a little girl and have not been violently raped. I refuse to be abjectly grateful for ‘getting off easy’ with the experiences I’ve mentioned here.
Because I deeply resent that they are normal.
Because I can hardly stand the thought of these constant erosions of personhood seeming normal to our daughters and sons.
But for this love and gentleness and compassion, I am infinitely grateful.
I have a different opinion (but her’s is totally valid). I say, why not do the happy dance? Why not celebrate? I too feel sad that some of these things are “normal” to some people and that others have experienced them. However, I appreciate that I have been very blessed, both by experiences I have had, and those I have not.
For example… I have never…
- been raped
- been molested
- been beat up
- been shot
- been physically surrounded by war
- been physically stalked
- lost someone close to me
- and much more..
In contrast, I can admit that I have…
- hurt myself on purpose
- been bullied
- attempted suicide
- had “unwanted physical contact”
- been stolen from
- grown up in a single parent household
- bullied others
- been mean
- hurt others physically (though I am not very strong haha)
- potentially given others “unwanted physical contact”
- stolen from others
- found unconditional happiness
- known love
- loved myself (and still do!)
- lived my dreams (too many to count last year alone)
- helped others
- inspired others
- gotten to exactly where I want to be
- made a commitment to love and kindness
I am so grateful for all of it! I am so blessed by everything. Because ALL of this, makes me who I am today.