Pay it Forward as a Christian Allegory and A Poem about Loss

SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! SPOILERS! 

Last night I re-watched Pay it Forward. This movie gets me every time. So beautiful and tragic * sigh *

I had never viewed it as a Christian Allegory before but that was definitely the reading I got this time. I think the kid represented Jesus, the people he helped were his disciples and well… you know how it ends. I think the Mom might have been some sort of Mary Magdalene figure.

Then I got to thinking, what if all of life is a Christian Allegory. I mean Jesus is Love right? And since everyone is a “divine creation” we are all Love. And if all of life is here to teach us about love and compassion then each death is for our sins. So we are all Jesus, in a way. Possibly? (Note: I am not Christian and I am not trying to be sacrilegious by writing this… I just like thinking about how love shows up in the world. No offence intended). Anywho I was really upset last night. I started pondering some recent events that have transpired in my life. The unfairness of loss. I think taking life is the worst thing one can do (weather it be the life of another or your own). I wanna watch some more Leo Buscaglia and go hug everyone. Love more. Yes…. and now a poem
Loss

 A POEM ABOUT LOSS

the inescapable feeling of all the air suddenly disappearing from my lungs,

and the unsatisfyable need to be anywhere but here.

and the sinking knowing that in this moment everything is not alright.

and the uncomfortable notion of observing the bloodshot and tear stained eyes of my weeping self. and the search for beauty in that moment but the finding of only emptiness. vast, cold emptiness.

and despite all of the happiness and joy I might have had today I want nothing more than I cry myself to sleep.

and grab, squeeze, reach any part of you or anyone who has ever known you, or would want to, or would pretend to.

bolting from the room as if to vomit up my pain and shock.

and thinking deep down that everything will be fine, and there is a lesson to be learned, and this challenge will make me stronger… but not caring because I cannot breathe.

and sinking down, away, into the bathroom stall.

but not caring because I cannot breathe.

and I think that it’s unfair. But a life taken doesn’t care.

and I think that it’s not right. But that won’t bring you back tonight.

And I am at a loss.

of life.

This was gonna be a tweet then I made it into a song

G F

This was a black day and we didn’t make it to December.

G F

We held on as long as we could then we let go, we will remember

G Cadd9

Looked at the leaves and we looked in our hearts

G

Lengthened our sleeves and our grip on the stars

F G

We’re all gonna bury our folks some day unless they bury us first

F G

The challenge of letting go just gets worse and worse

G Cadd9

This tragedy takes hold My tired hands get old

G

Cuts like a knife, the loss and the spite

G F

This was a black day and we didn’t make it to December.

F G

We held on as long as we could then we let go, we will remember

 

GO TELL PEOPLE YOU LOVE THEM PLEASE AND THANK YOU, YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN IT COULD BE TOO LATE.

PS Sorta inspire by this song:

What are 3 words you’d like people use to describe you when you’re dead? Why?

Compassionate.

I think that compassion is the most important human quality. The Dalai Lama once said, “If we develop a good heart, real appreciation, love and compassion for others, our life will improve.” Compassion makes the world a better and more accepting place to live in and if I can conjure any of that in my lifetime, then my life will be of service to the greater good.

 

Love-inspiring.

I have noticed that unconditional love in transforming our planet. If I can bring that love into my own life with such passion that it inspires others, I will have lived my truest, most valuable life.

 

Spirited.

Carpe Diem. I will only live each moment once and I think through pursuits of adventure, it is possible to honor every moment, and do so with passion. Why be “ok” when you could be “amazing”? I aim to bring spirit and energy into all of my actions and endeavors.

The Fire

Two children burned to death while I slept this morning.

I heard the sirens while I dreamed. They were four houses away.

In the distance I could sprint in three seconds, lives were forever changed. Some may look at this as a chance to place blame, to condemn others as the fire did the children. I am taking it as a reminder to spare no kindness, neglect no one, and let love be far reaching like hands of time.

For we are so fragile,

And our cracking bones make noise

And we are just

breakable, breakable, breakable girls and boys.

– Breakable by Ingrid Michaelson

 

I write, in memory, for those I have not known.

Ode to the Unknown Child

The darkness of the ashes burns my soul.

For the unknown child is faceless in the cold.

 

Let us take this every moment,

to be grateful and to show it.

Let our love be everlasting and renewed.

With each day that we are given

make the moments; really live them.

Spare no kindness and leave no promise unfulfilled.

 

It takes days and weeks to sort out the flames.

To understand the heat over the graves.

We push through the smoke, keep looking in hope.

We wonder what does it mean?

 

Let us take this every moment,

to be grateful and to show it.

Let our love be everlasting and renewed.

With each day that we are given

make the moments; really live them.

Spare no kindness and leave no promise unfulfilled.

 

Cannibalism in Nature

So I had a thought last night…

Let’s say I grow some strawberries. Then I wash them and eat them. Of course I choose not to eat the leaves so I compost them. I wait until the compost is ready to be used a fertilizer and then I spread it back on the strawberry plant.

In a way the strawberry plant is eating old strawberry remains…

So nature promotes cannibalism? O.o

Kent State

Photo by Chuck Ayers, Kent State University Archives

Today my Dad informed me that it is the 40th anniversary of the Kent State Shootings. On May 4th, 1970 four student protestors were shot by the National Guard. Dad showed me an informative article published in the National Post that features a very comprehensive breakdown of what happened. The shootings were a major turning point in the history of crowd control and also of public opinion regarding the Vietnam War.

I’m glad I got to learn about this historical moment today. With my limited (but still memorable) experience protesting (and my desire to protest in the future if the need arises) situations like this upset me. While the shooting was not unprovoked, I feel that violence is never the answer. I hope we can all look back on this tragic event and remember to always treat others with compassion and understanding.

Ohio by Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young