What opens you to creating connections and being in relationships?

This was inspired by the amazing workshop, Kindred Spirit, I attended with Matthew and Terces Engelhart from Cafe Gratitude on the weekend.

I am creating that yesterdays post was really heavy. I want to try the opposite!

What opens you to creating connections and being in relationships?

NOTE: We are all in relationships with EVERYONE all the time. There is so much more than just intimate relationships. Friendships are relationships. There are work relationships. I even have a relationship with the Earth, Nature and our planet.

This was a really big question for me to answer. It would be really cool to hear what other people think! Please share in comments! : D

NOTE: I think sharing is contributing to the whole and making yourself available to be spoken through/ by love. I think sharing is an expression of love.

So what opens me? Synergy! Connecting with others! Feeling acknowledged! Being inspired! Being creative! Feeling accepted! Giving and receiving hugs! High Fives! Shared hobbies! Dancing with partners! Singing in harmony! Being listened to! Being heard! Listening to others! Being a safe space! Helping others! Being supported and cared for by others! Winning at life! Shared laughter! Kisses! Sharing a smile! Holding hands! Pounding it! Secret handshakes! Running! Jumping! Not being alone! Being watched and admired! Being trusted! Holding my own integrity! Keeping promises! Playing games! Making up stories! Buying things! Giving things away! Volunteering! Getting help! Picking up trash with others! Seeing part of me reflected by other people.

I am so up for creating connections and relationships!

I think relationships are a mirror, designed to reflect ourselves. I want to be a reflection of unconditional love!

I am committed to creating a life of unconditional love and unconditional trust.

What stops you from creating connections and being in relationships?

This was how my amazing workshop, Kindred Spirit, with Matthew and Terces Engelhart from Cafe Gratitude began.

What stops you from creating connections and being in relationships?

NOTE: We are all in relationships with EVERYONE all the time. There is so much more than just intimate relationships. Friendships are relationships. There are work relationships. I even have a relationship with the Earth, Nature and our planet.

This was a really big question for me to answer. It was really cool to hear what other people expressed. Their sharing helped me to define my own challenges.

NOTE: I think sharing is contributing to the whole and making yourself available to be spoken through/ by love. I think sharing is expression love.

So what stops me? A lack of trust stops me from creating connections and being in relationships. Sometimes other people do not fulfill my expectations. By being transparent (honest + brave), making requests and communicating my experience (observations/thoughts/feelings/wants) I can face my fear and create a life of trust for myself. Sometimes I doubt other people. By acknowledging others and taking responsibility for my experience through the tool of apology I can fully trust and love others unconditionally. Sometimes I am afraid of failing, or of doing a “bad job”and I choose to work alone. Sometimes I stop communicating to other people because I think it will be easier to “just do it myself”. I think “other people won’t meet my standards”. I am not committed to this thinking. I am committed to being a source of unconditional love. I am choosing to value creating connections and being in relationships over being “right” or “the best”. Finally, sometimes I check out of relationships! I am afraid “someone better” or more suited to me will come along and I will miss out. I am committed to seeing each moment and relationship as an opportunity for learning and growth. I have to power to say yes and no whenever I like and that is okay! It is okay to change my mind but I will not let thinking of the future stop me from living in the present and creating connections and being in relationships.

I am so up for being vulnerable and committing to addressing these things!

I think relationships are a mirror, designed to reflect ourselves. I want to be a reflection of unconditional love!

I am committed to creating a life of unconditional love and unconditional trust.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lessons from this semester

Lessons from this semester: (or at least I hope they are lessons and I don’t repeat the same things over again)

  1. Getting what you ask for and getting what you want are not the same thing.
  2. To figure out what you like, you need to experience what you don’t like.
  3. Some things in life are scary. They are often the most rewarding things. Don’t be a pussy.
  4. Failing = Learning (and if life is about learning, then failure is success)
  5. There is a time and a place for everything.
  6. Follow your heart and you intuition. If something feels like a bad idea, it probably is… don’t be stupid (but if you fail see #4).
  7. Don’t walk in the mud with nice shoes. Metaphorically and literally.
  8. DIPLOMACY is an amazing skill to have. (Must. Work. On. This.)
  9. 720p and 1080p are NOT the same quality. (see #2).
  10. Positivity and gratitude are always the answer.
  11. When other people disappoint you, it is an opportunity for you to not disappoint others. (see #2).
  12. Criticism is awesome, it helps you learn. (however see #5).
  13. When challenges come up: recognize them (do not dismiss or ignore them), accept them, find the opportunity they present, and practice gratitude.

That is all. For now.

Oh! and don’t forget to dance! : )

ACKNOWLEDGE YOURSELF.

ACKNOWLEDGE YOURSELF.

Give yourself permission to acknowledge yourself. What are you not appreciating about you? What are you afraid to say?

Yesterday I was at a workshop and as it ended we randomly acknowledged the other participants. As we were doing this I was reflecting on my experience at the workshop. I like to think back and look for areas I can improve after I complete an experience. It isn’t an inherently negative process by any means, I am looking for opportunities to be more awesome. However I think we all struggle with negative self talk. On this day, I was thinking about how sometimes I don’t communicate clearly. I was noticing how sometimes I figure out what I want to say only though saying it, and when I first start talking sometimes the meaning gets lost because I am not clear myself on the best way to share my ideas. It was so strange for me though because the woman that acknowledged me, specifically spoke about how well I articulated myself and the value she found in the questions and comments I shared.

It is so ironic when other people acknowledge us for things we have not acknowledged ourselves for.

This reminded me of the great SuperForest post that SF Mathew made about the Leaders Causing Leaders conference. In their speech (go view the post to watch it, HIGHLY RECOMMENDED) the Engelhart’s talk about how you can create other people. By recognizing and acknowledging things in others, even if there is not evidence that these qualities exist, we can grow people. I think it works the same way with negative things, even if these is no evidence of something, hearing it enough will make it true for you…

I’d never thought of applying this logic internally. What if, instead of trying to improve things, or change things about our selves, we simply acknowledged ourselves for being the things we are trying to cultivate internally. Perhaps we would naturally grow as a result of the positive acknowledgement.

For example, lately I have been working on my spacial awareness. I noticed that when I believed I was coordinated and aware of my environment, I did not have issues with spacial awareness (parking lots can be scary!).

I suppose this is how affirmations work. Interesting.

ACKNOWLEDGE YOURSELF.

Give yourself permission to acknowledge yourself. What are you not appreciating about you? What are you afraid to say?

 

My First Leadership Workshop!

Today I was honoured to give my first workshop at the SFU Leadership Summit.My topic was “How to change the world and yourself in the process”. I basically talked about my personal journey with positivity, SuperForest, and how I created my manifesto. It was really a full circle moment. I am so grateful for the people that I personally invited who attended, and the unexpected group from my high school that sat in the front row, and the people I was suprised to see, and the people I didn’t even know who came out!
In making the presentation I had a much needed opportunity to reflect on myself and my perspective. Due to an interesting transition into 2011 with some events that really taught me a lot about myself I had almost forgotten little bits of me. I am glad to have evolved and found those little pieces that have been lost for the past few weeks.
I can’t really word this in the best way yet but I was thinking…When it feels like part of you is totally dependant on someone else, it is interesting that when they leave, some parts of you were really just you all along.

This reaffirmed my idea that there is only oner person in the world, really. Yourself (so me haha). Everyone else is just your perception of them. So when people change you, they don’t really… you change you. You have all the tools you need to be whatever you want.
I really enjoyed presenting and I got a lot of positive feedback after the presentation. I feel like I want to do it again. I’ve already started thinking of things I could make more awesome about it.
I feel like there is a message here. A message of love, and making the world a better place. I feel like I want to keep telling this story. To anyone who will listen.

I am excited to see where this takes me.

KWAN SEUM BOSAL! NAMASTE!